In the Mind of the Afraid
by Letselina
Summary: Inside the mind of Shuyin as he continues his merciless journey throughout FFX-2. (One-Shot)


In the Mind of the Afraid  
_An FFX-2 One Shot_

Shuyin stood in the Farplane Abyss. In front of him sat the most beautiful creature he had set his eyes on in a thousand years.

_Lenne._

Her name resounded through his thoughts. The name of the songstress who broken the wall around his heart and claimed it for her own. And every day he wished he could go back and re-do that fateful day. If he hadn't been so foolish to try using Vegnagun, they would have lived until a great age took their breath. But now he was dead, and he would succeed.

Shuyin watched as she stood up, and he began to near her. Pyreflies surrounded her, but he thought nothing of it. She seemed... different. But he was different too. After a thousand years, he just hoped she remembered him. The look of suprise on her face made him nervous. "I finally found you," he said. His heart was beating rapidly.

"Is it... really you?" she questioned, unsure. How could she be unsure? Their love had been so perfect. How could she forget his face?

"It's me, Shuyin. I've waited so long Lenne," he said softly, slowly walking towards her.

"But I'm not Lenne," the woman said, turning her back to him.

How could she not be Lenne? This was the young woman he had fallen in love with. He could feel her presence near him, even in the Farplane. "Lenne, we disappeared together, but when I awoke, I was alone. But I realized something. Spira hasn't changed at all. People still fight for no reason, still dying like they used to. Vegnagun will make that all go away," he said clenching a fist. Shuyin wished that Spira would learn from his mistake of using deadly machinery to fight... but all Spira knew was Lenne's name. Not her story, her beauty, not even his name. "And we'll fade away together. Help me do it, Lenne." He set a hand on her shoulder, puzzled at the way her body tensed under his touch. She couldn't possibly be telling the truth. Maybe she was just afraid... He turned her body, somewhat forcefully, embracing her. Lenne's skin against his own made him feel alive again. Shuyin felt she was confused, but it had been a thousand years. And when everything was over, he'd help her recall their past.

"Open your eyes!"

Shuyin did so, remembering he wasn't alive. He had taken over the Praetor's body, so he could finish his mission. But the woman in front of him startled him. It wasn't Lenne. Her hair was shorter, and he wasn't gazing into those soft amber brown orbs, but a pair of sapphire-emerald eyes that held tears of confusion, anger, and sadness. Lenne was inside this young woman. He'd save her soon. Running off into the heart of the Farplane, he regained his thoughts, remembering his plan. But part of his mind was still focused on her. Lenne.

Shuyin continued up the long path to Vegnagun. His plan had finally come to mind two years ago, and he took over the body of a young man who seeked death. He knew that if something happened, the 'Deathseeker' would finally be granted his wish. Now he was in the body of a young man who led the dying religion of Yevon. He loathed the followers of Yevon. It was pointless now everyone knew the truth. And because of Yevon, he and Lenne perished. His past haunted him every moment. The forgiveness in Lenne's eyes as they had been mercilessly shot to death. Why had they been shot to death? Because he wanted to destroy the enemy to save the summoners.

Finally, he came upon Vegnagun. Everything was nearly ready. He felt dizzy with excitement. Spira would finally get its just reward for ruining his life. He would purge the world of it's falsity and Spira would be cleansed. Sitting himself on the bench, Shuyin looked at the keyboard. "Perfect." Lifting his hands, rather the Praetor's hands up, he came down on a clashing chord. Memories swamped over him like a tsunami as he played to melody that would awaken Vegnagun.

* * *

"Shuyin," the songstress Lenne beckoned quietly. She was sitting against the wall behind the stage of the Zanarkand stadium.

"Hey, you did great out-- what's wrong!" he asked worriedly, rushing to her. Crystaline tears rolled down her face.

Lenne looked up at him with those amber brown pools. "No one understands me but you, Shuyin. And because of it..." she stopped, soft sobs cutting her speech short.

"Lenne," he whispered, taking her in his arms. "What's going on? You haven't told me anything. What's going to happen?"

"The summoners..." she whispered, "They are Zanarkand's final defense against Bevelle. We don't stand a chance against their machinery."

Shuyin clenched his teeth together. How could they let the summoners go out there? They knew they would die... So what was the point? "Don't worry Lenne. I'll find a way."

* * *

Weeks later, he found himself sitting at Vegnagun's control center. "I'll save you Lenne," he said to himself as he began to play the piano-controlled weapon. The summoners had been sent out to their certain deaths and he wasn't going to sit and watch while his beloved met her fate.

"No!" Lenne cried.

Shuyin looked at her. She was alive!

"You must stop!" she said. Quickly she turned, hearing the clacking of boots against cement.

Together they ran to the center of Vegnagun. "Lenne, I'm so sorry..." he searched her eyes for any sign of forgiveness.

Nodding, Lenne smiled weakly. She opened her mouth to speak, but all that was heard was the gunshots that took their lives.

* * *

Shuyin opened his eyes, walking dizzily from Vegnagun's fall. How could he lose? But... there she was. Lenne. He broke free of the man's body he has possessed, and noticed one of the young women run to his body. It didn't matter. "Lenne?"

"Shuyin... There's something I must tell you. Words left unspoken for a thousand years..."

He couldn't believe that someone would trick him like this. Lenne had been standing in front of him. Those soft brown eyes gazing into his, piercing through his heart. She was with him, not lost in some abyss. But those amazing amber brown orbs became a pair of determined sapphire-emerald ones. Angered, Shuyin fought. They'd pay for making him a fool! But he knew he couldn't win. Inside he could tell the woman who posed as Lenne was fighting for her, trying to make him understand. 'No,' he thought. 'The old Shuyin would understand. But not me. A thousand years is too long.'

"Shuyin..." she whispered. The Lenne poser stepped towards her.

"Don't try and tell me you understand!" he growled. The blitzer watched her every move, and noticed another, familiar, woman detach from her body and walk towards him. Was it real this time? "Lenne?" he watched her walk towards him, but resisted her touch. He didn't want to be hurt anymore. Raising his hand to push her away, she took it, her soft touch calming his nerves. "Lenne..."

"Hi there," the songstress smiled, her voice giving an ethreal effect.

No matter how happy he felt, the pessimistic side of himself that had grown over the course of a thousand years spoke for him, "A thousand years and this is all the moment we get?"

"This moment is enough," Lenne said firmly, "I don't need anything else. Just knowing how you feel is enough."

Shuyin looked up at her, his body loosening. It was really her. She knew that he had fought for a thousand years to be reunited with her.

"Shuyin, let's end this. Let's go home," she said, squeezing his hand gently.

His shoulders drooped. Home? Zanarkand? "Can we?" he wondered.

"That was all a thousand years ago. We've come too far to look back now." Lenne knelt down to him, "Rest Shuyin. Rest with me."

He put his head on her shoulder, feeling her arms wrap around his body. The warmth her spirit gave off showed that he had given up so much and forgotten his purpose. The real Shuyin was alive again, or at least as alive as Lenne was.

"Let's go. I have a new song for you," she smiled. Lenne turned to the woman who had 'posed' as her. "Thank you."

The young woman smiled softly, her sapphire-emerald eyes now slightly damp. She hadn't been there to hurt him. She had tried to help him. She brought him Lenne...

* * *

"Shuyin, all these years you spent trying to destroy Spira?" Lenne looked at him, a soft but troubled frown on her face. "Why? You killed so many people..." They stood in the Farplane Abyss, guessing why they had been seperated.

"Lenne, listen to me. For a thousand years, I searched for you. We disappeared together but I woke up alone. I was afraid!" Shuyin argued. Why was he having this battle with her? Why didn't she understand? "I tried to find you but you were gone."

The songstress looked away. "You killed those people for me then?"

"No! Lenne, you have to understand--"

"I do understand, Shuyin. You forgot me. I know you won't admit it to me, but you know yourself that you had forgotten all about me. All you cared about was your petty anger!" Lenne snapped.

The blitzer was speechless. Lenne never got angry, at least at him. And when she did get angry, it wasn't nearly this bad. "Lenne..."

"Shuyin you never did anything after the first few years to find me. You knew it when you embraced Yuna in this very field. If you had really cared for me, you would have known that I was there; and done something about it! I could have just as easily taken over her body, but I didn't. Unlike you, I didn't kill hundreds, thousands, of people because the memory of our death haunted me. Do you think it was easy being trapped for a thousand years in a dressphere? Other people felt my feelings! Saw my memories! Sang my songs!" Lenne swallowed, hot tears burning in her eyes.

"Lenne, please," he pleaded. He attempted to embrace her but she pushed him off.

"No, Shuyin... you've proved your love for me already. And you failed," she shook her head angrily, long locks of copper hair falling in her eyes. The songstress turned on her heel, running out of the abyss and into a place that seemed to represent the Zanarkand stadium. Falling to her knees, she began to sob. She had truly thought she could forgive him, but it seemed she had grown out of that.

"Please," a child said behind her.

Lenne looked at the small hooded child. She reconized him... it was a Fayth. Sniffling, she rubbed her now pink nose.

"Do not be angry with him. It was not Shuyin who killed. It was his anger," the Fayth said. "Listen to your own song, Lady Lenne. Your words do touch the hearts of others. Let it heal yours and Shuyin's."

Lenne watched as the boy faded away. Memories consumed her mind but a hand on her shoulder brought her back to reality.

"Lenne... I'm sorry..."

The songstress faced her beloved, soft tears falling down her face. She looked into his soft cerulean eyes. "No Shuyin... It's okay. I'm sorry. I understand your pain. I felt it too..."

Shuyin gazed into the endless amber brown abyss of her eyes. He wrapped his arms around Lenne, hiding his tears. "I love you Lenne. After a thousand years, nothing could change that."

"I love you too Shuyin."

"I don't think I could be without you any longer... Thank you for saving me..." Shuyin whispered.

* * *

_A/N: This is the same story as my old songfic "Everytime" just without the lyrics Review!_


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